Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Helpy No

You all know I am a fan of SkyMall.  My liking comes from the combination of a few factors: although I will HAPPILY look at anyone else's fashion magazine, I refuse to purchase them myself (unless it is the wedding issue); I can't do anything productive while flying; usually the airline magazine in my pocket has only the hardest Sudoku left.  So, SkyMall it is.

I've been flying a lot lately, and so I was very surprised that this amazing invention had not caught my attention until this last Monday:

From the product description:  
Optimize travel time with the hands-free way to tote your wheeled luggage--The Helpy is a comfortably fitting shoulder harness that allows you to conveniently pull your wheeled luggage behind you, leaving both your hands free to dial a number, check emails, hold your child's hand, push a stroller and multitask on the go. The sturdy hook design works with most handles on any piece of wheeled luggage. Unisex, in Black only.

I have several pressing concerns:

a) It is called The Helpy.
b) Escalators.
c) That by some freak accident these will pull a Snuggie and become popular, making airports even more hellish than they are now, AND that they will migrate from airports to campuses where those that use roller-backpacks will embrace them.
d) If our hands are available to be on our phones, our eyes will also be on our phone and we won't be looking out for other Helpy users--and we will all be mopping the airport floor with our faces (and by we I mean everyone else, because I swear to never own one).
e) It only comes in Black.

In conclusion, I plead with all of you other SkyMall readers to do what you usually do and DO NOT PURCHASE this item.  It is JUST as weird as all of that LOTR and HP fan merchandise.

In other news, the Universe has paid me back.  A couple posts ago, I got to the end of writing and discovered that my last half of my Twix was gone, and that I had no memory of eating it.  Well, today, in the middle of this post I went to the vending machine (which is DANGEROUSLY close to my desk) to get a Twix.  I put in my dollar, pushed 3 and then 0 and looked to the Twix bar.  IT WAS STUCK!!  I HATE WHEN THAT HAPPENS.  I started hitting the machine trying to get it to fall, and then proceded to kick it.

I went to look for the little phone number to call, and then I saw the screen:  Credit: $1.00.   No way!  I pushed 3-0 again.  The spiral strained for a second, and then TWO Twixes shot out.  TWO!  I was so happy.

However, I do apologize to whatever person did get ripped off earlier.  I really hate when that happens.  The Twix is in my desk if you want it.


The Yellow Dart said...

That bag looks way too easy to steal. And I don't even think like a thief.

The McKinleys said...

oh jenny. i love you! thanks for making me laugh :)
danny loves the sky mall too.

p.s. remember how you said you'd come down to nephi?? didn't you say this weekend?? i'm holding you to your word...

Paul & Rachel said...

i always find myself catching up on the most recent sky mall issue when i fly as well :) p.s. i heart twix! i'd probably die if an endless supply was placed near me at all times. i guess that's what the thin mints sitting on my counter are for... to kill me off.

eduffles said...


Jane said...

This is so a w e s o m e. I've never heard of the Helpy, but I will now be looking for it the next time I fly.